Fighting For My Preborn Son Helped Me Grieve In Peace

/ Commentary

Reprint from Wedefendlifeblog.blogspot.com

When I was pregnant with my son Gabriel, I found out he had a hole in his belly with his bowels on the outside — a condition called Omphalocele. I also had a weak cervix for which I needed a stitch sewn onto it.

The doctors pressured me to have an abortion, but I was adamant about continuing my pregnancy with Gabriel. I got connected to other mothers of babies born with Gabriel’s condition and I learned so much. I was prepared to go through it all. The life-affirming support I received from them is what empowered me.

Realizing they couldn’t break my fortified resolve, the doctors changed their approach. They began telling me that I should “let nature take its course," instead of getting my cervix sewn. That stitch was needed to reduce the risk of premature birth, which would have added another obstacle on top of what he was already going through. I was not about to allow him to slip from this world the same reason [weak cervix] his brother, Kyler, did 10 years before him.

I told them that if God brought me to a point where the procedure could be done on my cervix, I was getting it done.

I questioned why a life-SAVING procedure was being discouraged, while a life-STEALING one was being recommended. Why they only saw what was wrong with my son — instead of him as a human being worthy of saving.

They quickly retracted their statement and said they would do it. Unfortunately, to my dismay, I lost Gabriel in October of 2018 at 14 weeks — 4 days shy of when they were going to do the procedure on my cervix.

They tried to get me to choose abortion. They tried to get me to deny my stitch. They tried to get me to give up in every way possible before I even gave God a chance to work. God took care of it all!

Now, I can live and grieve in peace knowing that he didn’t have to receive healing in Heaven from something intentionally done to him on Earth. That while my body failed us, I did not.

I will see my children again someday (I believe that with every fiber of my being) and I can look Gabriel in the eye and say, "I fought for you son."

My children have only emboldened me towards the fight for life because I saw and held their humanity at stages this world deems unworthy of protection; I experienced just how hard society pressures women to abort their babies who are deemed medically imperfect.


The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Human Defense Initiative.

Fighting For My Preborn Son Helped Me Grieve In Peace
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