Carmen's Story

by Carmen
/ Commentary

When I first found out I was pregnant I was so filled with joy in my heart knowing I had a new life growing inside of me. However, I was only 26 years old and very naive about the development of my preborn child. I was eight weeks pregnant when I found out and when I told my boyfriend I was carrying his child I became very scared.

He told me he did not want to be a father and he was not going to have anything to do with me and our baby. I suddenly felt alone and abandoned. I was new to the area and did not know there were any pregnancy centers which could have helped me.

I was a dancer and worried about how I was going to make a living so I made an abortion appointment. I remember crying in excruciating pain both physically and mentally that day. The father of my baby never contacted me again after my abortion and I was left abandoned to deal with everything I had gone through alone.

I became very depressed and I just wanted to forget what I had done. I started using hard drugs and drinking hard to try to forget. Years later I met my husband and quit dancing, drugs, and drinking. I had already undergone conversion by then [to being Christian and being pro-life]. I wanted to have a baby with my husband but I was not able to get pregnant. However, he had two children from a prior relationship and I accepted them and loved them as if they were my own.

Now I am 61 years old and very much pro-life. I have sought forgiveness from God and been through many years of therapy. I even attended a Rachel’s Vineyard retreat  at which I found a lot of peace and healing. The retreat was something my heart and soul needed and I am so grateful I attended. It truly helped me live out my new life in peace and forgiveness from our Lord, my baby, and myself.

However, every year around Mother’s Day I mourn my baby and want people to know the truth about abortion.

I have told my story to parishes, on public TV, and out in front of Planned Parenthood. I also pray at the abortion mills every month. At first, I was scared to share my testimony due to fear of judgment but I will not be silent about this. Too many lives are at stake and I want people to learn from my mistakes.

If I came across anyone considering abortion I would advise them against it and work with them to know that abortion is not necessary. I will always share my testimony with others to prevent their making the same mistake as I did.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Human Defense Initiative.

Carmen's Story
Share this

Subscribe to Human Defense Initiative